Crawling Back to You
by Phantom Creedy Lover
Summary: Placed two years after the game's ending, so spoilers for it. Stefan is visiting Cole, and finds an unexpected guest doing the same. He's apprehensive at first, but then he finds out several things he didn't know before. One sided Roy/Cole, Stefan/Roy friendship- or more, if you wish to see it that way.
1. Chapter 1

_Lessons learned, bridges burned to the ground,  
And it's too late now to put out the fire,  
Tables turned, and I'm the one who's burning now,  
Well I'm doing alright 'til I close my eyes and  
Then I see your face and it's no surprise_

Down on my knees, I thought I was stronger

It's hard to forget How I left you hanging  
On by a thread, when everything is said, I'll regret it  
I was doin' alright, thought I could make it  
Then I see your face and it's hard to fake it  
_I'd take it all back if only I knew that I could_

_- Crawling Back to You: Daughtry_

* * *

Stefan Bekowsky turned up the collar on his jacket and shrugged into it further. It was pouring rain, and being that it was the two-year anniversary of losing Cole in… that horrific way, and the weather had been the same the year prior, the weather seemed like a cruel joke. He glanced at the graveyard, trying to remember which section Cole's grave was in. He recalled it was on the right side, in a few rows, and about halfway down the row. He sighed and trudged up the small flight of stairs that led to the graves. He spotted the other '-sky' name that he recalled started Cole's row and pivoted to follow the line. He stopped abruptly upon seeing someone about thirty feet ahead.

Roy Earle, was standing there, looking down at the grave that Stefan recognized then as Cole's.

The young detective contemplating diving behind the nearest gravestone to avoid being seen by the older man, but A, on second thought that sounded like a dumb plan, and B, it sounded kind of disrespectful to whoever's grave he would've used as a shield. He looked around frantically, trying to find another hiding spot. Most of the LAPD who had known Cole had changed since… then. Even Roy had- to a point. The man was still easy to piss of if he jumped to conclusions about something, and there were about twenty conclusions that could be jumped to in their situation at that moment. Almost all of them ended in Stefan looking like a creep.

"I see you, Bekowsky. No one can miss that suit anywhere."

Stefan flinched when Roy's voice reached him. He had to bite his tongue to prevent the knee-jerk reaction of retaliating with "you should talk, Salmon Sleeves" that came to mind any time the vice detective had insulted him before. He simply pressed his lips together in a thin line and looked down, then glanced left and right. He hoped it looked like he was paying respects to one of the people on either side of him and not wondering why the Hell Roy Earle was standing in front of Cole's grave looking like he was in pain.

The black-haired man scoffed and backed away from the grave a couple of feet. He advanced on Stefan and tossed his arms out. "Here to chase me about like the German Whore or even the Former Missus Phelps did?" He demanded bitterly.

Stefan paused, then shook his head. "No, I'm here to pay my own…" He trailed off. Last he recalled, Roy and Cole hated each other- so what the Hell was he doing here. "… Respects… so why are you…?"

Roy scoffed again. "Of course, the heartless bastard who sold him out can't pay respects to the guy he knew was the best L.A detective in years, huh?"

Stefan opened his mouth, then firmly shut it again.

Roy shook his head, then shoved past the other man, taking care to let his shoulder slam into Stefan's own, nearly knocking him off balance.

Stefan righted himself and closed his eyes. He looked over his shoulder at Roy. "I don't blame you, you know…"

Roy stopped just at the mouth of the row of graves. He remained quiet, then replied without turning around. "Bullshit, Bekowsky. You all do. That kid Ralph, Biggs, Galloway punched me in the face as he announced the theory that Phelp's death was my fault. Connelly doesn't look me in the face, not that I mind the limey…" He trailed off. "You would think I magically raised those damn water levels in those pipes as opposed to giving the affair away."

Stefan shook his head. "We all know why you did that. You had no right to do it for that reason to begin with…" He bit his lip. It wasn't the place to argue about that topic.

Roy turned back slightly, and seemed to read Stefan's facial expression and came to the same conclusion. He shook his head and turned back around and started to walk again.

Stefan hesitated, then trotted after him. "Earle, hold on."

Roy stopped again and looked back at him. "What, Bekowsky? I have better things to do than stand around chatting with one of the boys who want me dead for starting to Golden Boy's fall."

Stefan slowed his pace. "I already told you I don't blame you." Stefan replied. "… You know the way to Rhodie's Bar?"

"Yeah, why?" Roy narrowed his eyes.

Stefan frowned."Just… come get a drink… for the… anniversary." He glanced back at Cole's grave. "Hell, call it for old time's sake, even if there were none between you and I." His frown deepened when Roy paled when he said 'old times sake' and looked like he was in pain again, while trying his damnedest to hide it. The younger detective decided to ignore it for now… or not bother unless Roy agreed to go for a drink… and he'd only ask if both of them were very, very drunk.

Roy loosened up after a moment. "Now why would I wanna do that? Last I checked we haven't spoken since that last case that overlapped both our departments a few months back."

Stefan tried not to growl. He was trying to be nice to a guy who he still honestly thought he was an asshole. Hell, he had bowed sarcastically to Roy during one of their first cases that overlapped- why stop that pattern now? The Hell with Graveyard Etiquette. "Fine then. The drink may help remove the get the giant pole that's stuck up your ass." He countered.

Roy raised his eyebrows and advanced on the man a second time. "Run that by me again?"

"You heard me, Earle." Stefan challenged. He put on a brave face, still expecting Roy to attack him, but to his surprise, Roy let out a genuine laugh a moment later as opposed to punching him- or breaking his neck with his bare hands.

"Yes I did, Beckow." Roy began, then sighed. "You know what? Fine. Who am I to turn down a chance at getting a drink anyway, huh?" He shrugged. "I'll meet you there. I have some stuff to handle- you wouldn't wanna hear about it."

"Hm," Stefan replied. He wasn't going to argue that point. He knew Roy was still corrupt. He was still in business with the Big Dogs- these days the Dogs were just a bit smaller.

Roy grunted himself, then shrugged further into his jacket. He took one last glance at Cole's grave before putting his hat back on and heading for his car.

Stefan watched him, arching an eyebrow when Roy passed him and he was confident the man wasn't going to turn around again. He briefly wondered if Roy had thought the offer for drinks meant that Stefan was buying. He pushed aside the thought. He was willing to buy a couple of drinks if they were essentially for Cole. He didn't mind the possibility of figuring out part of the mystery that was Roy Earle, either. It was enough for him that the offer had gone smoothly with no insults thrown his way- well, bad insults, anyway. He shook his head and made his way over to Cole's grave, nearly forgetting that was the reason of going to the graveyard in the first place. He knelt down, greeted his old friend, and told him all the things he could list off- how he was, how his girlfriend of eight months, Viv, was doing with him, how some of the rest of the crew that Cole had liked were, that Herschel had actually decked someone who had trash-talked Cole the week before, how they all missed him. He said his final goodbye- for then, anyway, and left, heading for his car.

It wasn't until then that he remembered it may have been a bad idea to go get a drink with one of the most hated cops in L.A. He ignored it, once again. Now wasn't the day to worry about that. He got in his car and started on his way to Rhodie's.


	2. Chapter 2

**Random Note: Pretty sure this is the angstiest thing I've ever written and it's not even that bad as far as angst goes. Wow. It gets lighter in the next couple of parts, I promise.**

* * *

_ Can I lose my need impress?_  
_ If you want the truth I need to confess_

_ I'm not alright, I'm broken inside_  
_ And all I go through, it leads me to you_  
_ Burn away the pride_  
_ Bring me to my weakness_  
_ Until everything I hide behind is gone_  
_ And when I'm open wide with nothing left to cling to_  
_ Only you are there to lead me on._  
_ Honestly, I'm not that strong._

_- "I'm Not Alright" - Sanctus Real_

* * *

Roy didn't know what had possessed him to actually listen to Stefan and wait for him at Rhodie's. It wasn't like any of his usual dives- Hell, he would never have set foot in the place if Stefan hadn't asked. It was for people that were below him, as far as he was concerned. He knew it was a favorite place for a few patrolmen to go after work. He couldn't wait for the strange looks he would get walking in there- not just from the cops, but from everyone. He would stick out like a sore thumb. Usually he wouldn't mind, but there were different circumstances this time. He glared up. "You enjoying this, Cole?" He muttered before getting out of the car. He headed inside, and tried not to roll his eyes when exactly what he thought would happen happened- at least ten sets of eyes went to him. He kept his eyes trained just above the floor as he headed for the bar itself, sliding onto the chair closest to the wall.

The bartender approached, not bothering to hide he was sizing up the other man, wondering why a guy in a suit like that came into his bar. "What can I get an upstanding gentleman such as yourself?"

Roy tried not to smirk at 'upstanding.' He leaned back. "You can give me a few minutes before my…" What was Bekowsky? Last he checked, he didn't have people he called friends. Then again, he and Bekowsky never had any issues with each other, so at least that was something. Besides, what would a bartender he would never see again care? "Friend gets here."

"Sure thing, pal." The bartender turned back to his own business.

Roy tried to make himself look busy, fiddling with his jacket or the matchbook inside one of his pockets. When he couldn't stop feeling sets of eyes on him, he glanced over his shoulder, seeing two of the latest recruits to patrol staring at him, muttering to each other. "Hey, Reed, Samuels. You keep staring like that, your eyes'll get stuck!" He called. He relaxed when that got them to look away and come up with new subject matter for their chat. He went back to looking busy for a while until he felt someone tap on his bicep a couple of times.

"Holy shit, you actually showed."

"Bekowsky," Roy greeted.

Stefan slid onto the stool next to him and waved the bartender over. "Hey, can I get a couple of shots of whiskey?"

The bartender nodded, then looked at Roy expectantly.

Roy shrugged. "Bourbon for me. Hell, bring us a bottle of it and a couple of glasses. And give us the expensive stuff, at that. So help you if I find out you gave us expensive shit." He replied.

The bartender blinked at him a couple of times, then looked at Stefan and raised an eyebrow.

Stefan, who had also been staring at Roy, looked back at him and waved his hand dismissively. "Don't worry about it, Lou. I'm afraid my… friend isn't trained to go out in public."

Lou and Roy both snorted, then Lou went to go get the requested drinks.

The two men waited in silence for a while. Once they got their drinks, Stefan hesitantly raised his first as Roy poured his. "To Cole, huh?"

Roy stared at the man's drink for a while, trying not to pull a face. However, he did bring his own glass to the other and grunted a response.

Stefan was never anyone to push a point, so he took the successful toast as a small victory.

Their next drink followed quickly in silence. The silence itself continued on for a few minutes. They both regretted being there alone. For the first time, Roy absolutely hated silence, so he figured he'd be the one to break it. "So if you're gonna stay quiet why the Hell did you bring me here? You had Galloway, or Leary, or Esteban or whatever the Hell his name is…"

"Enrique, and they're just fine on their own- thinking of what today is or not. I for one think that there shouldn't be a person who cared about Cole alone today."

"I cared for him as little as I care for you people, and I was fine last year, so why now?" Roy shot back.

"Because last I checked, not leaving your damn house on the one year anniversary isn't a good thing." Stefan challenged. "Yeah, I know about that. Galloway found out somehow and had a goddamn field day going against you for it." He added when Roy narrowed his eyes."Fine, you wanna hold that against me, then just call this karma."

"Thought people like you didn't believe in karma." Roy replied, taking a swig of his drink.

"Well, that just goes to prove that you should quit assuming things about people so quick." Stefan replied.

Roy curled his upper lip, clenched his fist and took yet another swig, trying not to deck the man.

Stefan rolled his eyes, then poured himself another drink. "Whatever…"

Silence took over again, and they had a few more drinks between them before Roy's set started to affect him. He didn't know what it was- maybe 'the expensive stuff' had a little more alcohol than he assumed, maybe it was the voice in the back of his head that was nagging him about talking that just happened to sound like Cole, maybe it was the fact that someone was finally bothering to actually hear his side of the story, but the sudden urge to speak came over him, and he fell to it. "He saved my life, you know. Three times." He didn't see Stefan look at him with surprise written on his face that he had even bothered talking. "One- he shoved me outta the way of a car coming right at me- probably one of Mickey's goons. Two- kicked my feet out from under me when some son of a bitch was about to shoot me, three… pulled me back before I fell two stories out of one of those damn Elysian Field house's skeletons because I had no idea the one damn door would lead to an unfinished room…" He let out a laugh that came out loud and high, indicating to both of them he was more drunk than either of them thought. "And how do I repay the guy? I throw him under the bus…" He shook his head. "Fuck it. I don't know why I bother denying it. I might as well have been responsible for his death, and I have to live with that."

Stefan was at a loss for words. He gaped like a fish out of water for a moment. He didn't even expect Roy to be a talker when he was, but that just definitely proved him wrong. He didn't even know what to say. He swallowed hard. He wouldn't touch the first issue, but the second he could work with. "You said yourself you didn't make the water level rise. Just keep blaming the water." He sighed. He had taken Cole's side when it came to Roy backstabbing him. Was Cole at fault for cheating on his wife? Yes. But throwing your partner under the bus to cover up one of the many things you were involved in so you'd get off clean? That was much worse. However, with the details Cole had given him on that whole fiasco, Roy's situation was still odd in his book. "And… and Cole told me you warned him to stay away from Elysian-"

"It was a warning from Monroe and those bastards, not me." Roy cut in.

"Cole didn't seem to think so- well, he did with the first, not the second one, anyway. He said you said it twice. He didn't know what to think when you said it the second time."

Roy flinched. "It doesn't change a damn thing. Hell, he still went after it- probably to spite me. He went after it, got involved with that moron Kelso, then that chase…"

Stefan frowned. "You know about that?"

Roy snorted. "You get enough info and hear about who's involved, you basically put things together on your own."

Stefan frowned, then nodded. "Cole called me. Told me to try and stall as many patrolmen as I could with that."

Roy raised his eyebrows. "Half expected you to be in the back clipping the patrol cars that got too close to one of their cars."

Stefan shook his head. "I wish. Who knows what woulda changed if Cole had more back-up."

"Not a damn thing." Roy deadpanned, taking a swig of his drink again.

Stefan narrowed his eyes. "Huh?"

Roy scoffed. "Come on. You really think those two young bloods and the old bat coulda made it that far against all those patrols without some help?"

Realization dawned on Stefan. "You…?" He looked towards the front of the bar, out the window and at Roy's car.

"Didn't use that one, and a lot good it did anyway, huh?" Roy picked up his glass again and moved it in a circle so the contents swished around. "Could've gone with them all the way, but I figured that wouldn't be welcomed."

Stefan frowned again. "But you… I thought…?"

"What? I hated him as much as he hated me back then? Yeah, I did. That didn't mean I didn't trust the crazy bastard, whatever scheme he was trying to pull."

The amount of brainpower it was taking for Stefan to absorb the new information was making him sober up already. He was aware the man could've been bullshitting him- he wouldn't put it past him, but if he wasn't… Hell, was he even really drunk? The man sighed. He'd just have to go along with whatever the man said for now.

Roy shook his head and took another drink. "'S not like it matters now."

Stefan sighed and took the bottle of bourbon and Roy's glass away. "You know what? I think that's enough for you. Lou?"

Lou came over and took both things, seeming quite happy that the mystery man had been cut off, taking pride in seeing Roy try to snatch the things back- but overshooting to the left about four Roy glared the man down, Lou just smiled sarcastically and went about his work.

Stefan got up. He really hated what he was about to do, but whether he liked it or not- Roy was still a cop and therefore a brother. "You know what? You're in no state to drive. I'll call someone to get your car-" He hesitated. He had Viv in mind for that, and he had a feeling Roy would find out somehow, and he highly doubted Roy would be happy that Stefan let a woman drive his car alone. "Or we'll take yours back to my place and I'll call someone to get mine."

"Hell no. I'm not letting anyone drive my car."

Stefan wanted to point out he had let Cole drive, but thought better of it. "Fine then, show me you can. Walk in a straight line from this table to that one." He pointed at a table ten feet away.

"' The fuck do you care, Bekowsky? Why are you bothering all of a sudden?" Roy snapped.

"I thought we established that." Stefan frowned. "Go," He shook his head when Roy went to, then stumbled, catching himself on the bar. "Right. Stay put. I'm gonna go make a call." He turned and headed for the phone as fast as possible, knowing full well Roy probably wasn't going to be staying put long- whether it was falling over or trying to escape didn't matter. He made the call to Vivian, and once she agreed to come, he thanked her, apologized then quickly hung up. Sure enough, when he got back, Roy's spot was vacant. He looked around, and when he didn't see the vice detective, he looked at Lou, who shrugged and pointed at the exit door. "Went that way. Muttered something about that guy Cole you mentioned really loving 'this', then left- well, stumbled out's more like it…" the bartender offered.

Stefan nodded, took his wallet and took out the cash he assumed would cover the drinks. "If it's not enough, just write what I owe you and tell me next time I'm here. Hopefully Earle'll remember to pay me back." He told the other man before heading out the door.

Once he got out, there was a low metallic rattle off to his left. Roy Earle punching a dumpster was not what Stefan expected the cause of the noise to be, but that was, in fact, the case. He sighed and went over to him, pulling back the man's shoulder before he could get in another punch. "Roy, come on. Let's go."

Roy unexpectedly eased up and stumbled back a few steps. "I miss him, Stefan…"

Stefan nodded slowly, wondering just how many things Roy had revealed that evening that Roy would be threatening him to keep quiet or be shot in the morning. He gave Roy's arm another tug. "I do too, Roy. Now come on, let's get you sobered up."


	3. Chapter 3

Roy groaned when he came to the next morning. Everything hurt, but his headache was most definitely the worst pain. He forced his eyes open a sliver, taking in his surroundings. Light tan walls, low light, dark brown furniture everywhere- just where the Hell was he? He squeezed his eyes shut, then opened them again. Somehow, some way, he remembered everything about the previous night- so was he in Bekowsky's place? It made sense. He strained to hear any clues- and a moment later, he got one- Stefan's voice was coming from a nearby room, and he didn't sound happy.

"Look, _Finbarr_. You don't have to like it… He needed a friend, I was there… I don't care. I don't call him a friend either, but hey, the Force makes us brothers, and it was for Cole… come on, give me a break… … … Fuck, Galloway! Did 'went out for a drink with Earle in Cole's honor' somehow translate to 'rob a bank with Earle' in that scrambled brain of yours? … … I just told you I don't! … That's the damn reason why I can't come in! … Well, would you trust Earle alone in your house?… No, didn't think so! … … Goddamn it. Stop arguing and just tell the Cap I can't come in… Well make something up! Christ!"

There was a rough sound of some hard object hitting another, and then nothing. Roy glanced behind him to see if he was on a bed or couch, and when he saw a couch arm, he scooted back in order to lean his head on it, his body protesting all the way.

A few moments later, Stefan came through the entryway Roy was facing. He was walking at a fast pace, spurred on by the annoyance that had started up due to the phone call, with the phone in hand. He spotted Roy awake, then nearly tripped over his own feet. He stood still and stared at him for about a second before he turned and walked back out of the room, slower this time. Another few moments passed, and he came in with a glass of water in one hand and a couple of asprin in the other. He held them out to Roy.

Roy sat up further, then eased his legs over the side of the couch so he was upright. "What, no hair of the dog that bit ya?"

"You drank enough for the week- or maybe even month last night, so no." Stefan replied.

Roy let out a syllable's worth of a laugh. "How many?"

"That you had? I lost count after ten."

Roy sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Please tell me they were all shots."

Stefan attempted a sympathetic look. "Some were…"

Roy shook his head. "… Am I lucky to not have died of alcohol poisoning?"

"Ohhhh, yeah." Stefan nodded.

Roy leaned back. "Fantastic. Spilled my guts to you and almost died. Some way to go." He looked around again, then frowned. . "Where's my car?"

"Up front, safe and sound and in sight, so if any punks try anything, they'll see it." Stefan offered a smile of his own, but it faded quickly, remembering a question he hadn't asked yet. "… So, how much of that phone call did you hear?"

Roy scoffed, even if his head gave further protest again. "… What, you afraid I'll be offended? I heard nothin' but the truth from your end, and I can figure out what Galloway said."

Stefan looked at his hands. "Look, Earle…"

"Don't sweat it, Bekow." Roy cut him off.

Stefan blinked at him, then nodded, relieved Roy either didn't want to hear it or foresaw what he would've said. He shook both hands a couple of times, repeating the offer.

Roy took both, downing the pills and water as fast as possible.

Once again, a silence that almost pained the two involved started between them and stayed around for a while. Like the first time, Roy was the first to break it. "I'm no good at thanking people." Roy cut him off, and looked away when Stefan looked at him, surprised the man even said anything of the sort for the second time in twenty four hours. "It's not… our people don't…"

"Don't worry ab-"

"Shut it. I'm trying to thank you, here." Roy cut him off.

Stefan put his hands up in defense.

Roy looked down. "… I'm not…" He struggled for words. "… Everyone knows people don't give a fuck about my side of that… time, so… … I owe you a lot… so…"Yeah, so… … thank you."

Stefan nodded after a moment. "You're welcome… … just don't make me regret it."

"Mm hm…" Roy hummed. He turned and put his legs back up on the couch. "On the phone it sounded like you didn't give a damn, so I'll just pass out here again and sleep this off." He turned his back towards Bekowsky.

Bekowsky stared at him for a while, then arched an eyebrow when Roy gave off a low snore. Well, that went a little too well… He shook his head and got up. He had things to do in order to distract himself until Roy woke up again.

* * *

"So, let me get this straight…" Vivian LeBlanc leaned forward, putting her arms on the restaurant table she and Stefan were sitting at two days later. Stefan and Rusty had gotten a case thats investigation lasted until three, so Rusty had insisted they go have lunch. Viv worked nearby, so Stefan had offered to invite her. Rusty had never been fond of her- mostly because of 'the way she thought', so he had sat on the other side of the room, at the bar table with his own food. "You go to pay respects to your friend, and the guy who half the people in the LAPD who knew your friend blames for his death is there, and you offer to go get a drink with him just because he looks hurt over it? Even after he's treated you like shit time and time again before?"

Stefan opened his mouth, then paused, waiting for the men around them who had turned to look at the pair to turn around before continuing. "… How may times am I gonna have to repeat to everyone that… he was different that whole night. Scary different. We both coulda used a friend. I call it a favor… I just didn't… … I think he really did care about Cole… more than we all thought." Stefan replied.

"You mean unlike you all thought, period?" Viv replied.

Stefan shrugged and nodded.

Vivian sighed. "Thanks to all of you and your boys' stories I trust him as little as you all do. Just be careful with him. He could be playing games."

"I know, I know… I just… for the first time I really, really hope he's not."

"I hope so for your sake, too. Wouldn't want anyone manipulating my man."

Stefan smiled, then leaned over. "It'll be fine. Don't worry about it. Now, Rusty's getting antsy over there, so let me go before he starts complaining and scaring everyone."

"Alright. And make sure he doesn't pull anything on you for helping Roy, either."

"Will do, Viv. See ya later."

* * *

Roy wasn't pulling anything. Even weeks after Stefan helped Roy out, their dynamic changed. Roy stopped his insults going Stefan's way, but didn't stop the ones against any other people. If they had any overlapping cases, he'd stick with Stefan, and if anyone had a theory about the case, he'd tell them to 'shut up and let Bekowsky talk.' Stefan wasn't at all sure what to think. When it got to the three month mark, Stefan was in the run for a promotion to Vice. After a while Stefan had a very, very big hunch Roy wasn't just pulling strings- he was yanking them to try and get him up to his rank and partnered up. The whole exchange led up to an arguement between Roy and Leary that nearly came to blows when all three men were in the same room. Even Stefan's "Can't we all just get along?" just increased the older pair's annoyance. However, as usual, Roy won, and Stefan was soon on his way into the Vice ranks.


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: Super-convenient plot point ahead. Don't scoff too hard.**

* * *

Stefan knew two things- One, Roy had inherited or made it his business to make his driving either equal or worse than Cole's. Two, Roy was going to be the death of him, one way or another. In the months that followed him being promoted to Vice, Stefan had more near-death experiences when he was in the co-passenger seat more than when druggies shot at him and Roy. If they were in a car chase and the suspect made a sharp turn, Roy would make a turn three or more times sharper than the suspect, while somehow managing to not flip the car- and he kept up with the suspect as well. There were also the few times during chases that Stefan had nearly lost his right arm since he was shooting at the suspect's tires when Roy thought it would be a fantastic idea to ram into the other car at near full-speed.

Stefan had started to wonder if Roy had a death wish- it had started off as a joke, really. Roy was back to his arrogant self, but as time went on and the memory of the first evening at Rhodie's remained in his head, Stefan was coming to terms with the possibility that it could be a fact- more so when Viv mentioned the same theory. That had led to another serious conversation at Rhodie's. Roy laughed off Stefan's worry and promised he wasn't suicidal- "Come on, I have a face like this and I want to end it all? Please. Now, when's Viv getting an engagement ring, huh?" As much as Stefan hated the subject change, he wasn't going to push.

Viv herself had added another layer of worry to Stefan's relationship with Roy. When Viv and the older detective first met, Viv had barely gotten a half-hearted greeting out of her mouth before she had added a threat against a certain appendage of Roy's if he hurt Stefan in any way. Roy had gawked at her for a few moments before the old Roy shone through and snapped at her about how 'a woman should know better than to talk to a man like that.' She returned the comeback with a comment about how small of a man he was as it was. That led to them trading insults about seven times, while Stefan sunk lower and lower in his chair, not at all sure how to handle the situation. However, someone could have knocked him over, when, after Viv's eighth insult, Roy laughed, shook the woman's hand, turned to Stefan, and called her a keeper. The argument trade sparked a friendship between Roy and Viv, to the point where Stefan was partially convinced Roy was going to steal her away from him. However, no such even happened.

Even Herschel had started to come to the occasional Rhodie's Meet-Up. It was more to get to know Stefan, being that he still trusted Roy about as far as he could throw him "which was, ya know, about a foot." But, they managed to tolerate each other for the most part.

When the third year anniversary of Cole's death rolled around, it was a near repeat of the previous year. Stefan had visited his grave, said what needed to be said, and left- only to see Roy in his car on the other side of the grounds. He walked over and tried to remain silent, realizing that Roy had a white-knuckled grip on the steering wheel and he was squeezing his eyes shut- just a sitting down version of the same look he had that previous year. Stefan knocked on the side of the door to get his attention. Roy tried to cover up the fact the sound made him jump, then saw the culprit and offered a smirk in greeting.

Stefan opened the door and sat in the co-passenger seat. He let a few moments of silence pass, then he looked at Roy again. "So… Rhodie's?"

"Rhodie's," Roy nodded, starting up the car.

Stefan leaned back and got comfortable, and if he saw that Roy's eyes seemed a bit bluer and glassier, well, he wasn't going to bother bringing it up yet.

* * *

He never got the chance. Their trip was cut short when Colmyer called them to a homicide case where two of the latest recruits were having trouble keeping the media- and civilians, at bay by a murder case. They settled for stopping for coffee and going to the scene. By the time they had made it to the scene, Roy had already voiced his theory on it- being that it was a typical Lover's Lane type area, a girlfriend wasn't letting a boyfriend get it in, so he killed her. Once they got there, chased off a few reporters, then took in the scene, Roy was convinced he was right.

"See, Bekow? Hormones win again. Hormones always win." The older man insisted.

"Whatever you say, Earle." Stefan rolled his eyes, looking over the scene to see if he could spot anything Mal could've used to help him get the entire story about how the girl was murdered.

"Pushover," Roy accused.

"Jackass," Stefan countered.

Roy smirked, then turned to see if any reporters had snuck back. No reporters caught his eye, but one of the men who had come down from the hill and were walking towards them. He dropped his cup of coffee, and didn't even realize it until it hit the ground and splashed up and onto his pants. Roy jerked back, knocking into Stefan as he did so."Holy shi…!"

Stefan stumbled, then caught himself. "Christ, Earle. What the Hell…?" He turned, then spotted what had gotten his attention. "Holy shit." He agreed. "That's…"

"That is a six-foot-something skinny-as-a-twig version of Phelps. The fuck…?" Roy finished. He started to walk, willing his feet to go, since they seemed to refuse to obey his mind at first. "Hey, you…"

The tall, blonde mystery man reached the pair. "You Bekowsky and Earle?"

"Yeah. Who the Hell are you?" Roy demanded, then pushed Stefan when the latter man elbowed him in the rib.

Richard McCallister, Homicide." The man replied. "Mal's got a theory that a boyfriend got handsy, the girl didn't like it, so he… went overboard, I guess you could say."

Roy looked at Stefan and smirked. "Toldja."

Richard frowned. "… Are you making a hoke about this case? Are you kidding? Someone's died!"

Roy arched an eyebrow. Are you fucking kidding me? "I made a theory that matched Mal's is all, Dick." Roy replied.

Richard looked at Stefan, who shook his head as if to say 'don't bother.' He scoffed. "Just keep the scavengers away." He ordered before heading back to the scene.

Roy watched him, then hesitated before running a hand over his face. "Hey, Bekowsky?"

"Earle?"

"… Cole have a brother or cousin or something we weren't aware of?"

"No idea."

"You don't think…"

"At this rate? I would not be surprised." Stefan nodded. "But you know one thing?"

Roy spotted a reporter sneaking up the hill. He walked forward a few feet, then pretended to go for his gun. The reporter scurried away. Roy smirked once again, then turned back to his partner. "What's that, Bekow?"

Stefan strolled over to him and gave him a not-gentle pat on the shoulder. "Ya know, if a second chance- Hell, maybe even a bit of redemption, was human- it just gave you a right hook that knocked you on your ass."

Roy rolled his eyes. "I don't believe in that crap, Bekowsky. You know that."

Stean arched an eyebrow, then nodded towards the scene. "After that? You might just start having to."

"Whatever." Roy waved him off.

* * *

Roy really, really hated when Stefan was right- especially where the new kid Richard was concerned. He ended up eerily like Cole- solving the cases and getting in everyone's good graces in record time- second only to Phelps himself. It bothered the Hell out of Roy, and it even got to Stefan a few times. He even had the no-nonsense attitude. The only difference between him and Cole were the fact that when Richard made a joke off duty, or even on, once he had adjusted well into his role as detective, it wasn't completely lost on those hearing it. Naturally, Roy hated the man, when Stefan didn't mind him.

When Richard had about enough of Roy snapping at him any time they crossed paths, or just giving him a constant nasty look and asked Stefan about it, Stefan caved. He told him about Cole, leaving out the man's fate as he did so, and the resemblance between the men. He kept Roy's side out of it. When Richard had commented that Cole 'must've been a weak guy to put up with a man like that and the way he treated him.' Stefan deadpanned Cole's fate, then backed up Roy, claiming he was 'a complex guy.' That promptly shut up Richard, and he had made a quick exit.

He remained skeptical about the 'Complex Man', and kept his distance from the pair, unless talking was absolutely necessary. Those necessary moments happened more and more often as time went on- and frequently ended in Roy and Richard yelling at each other and throwing insults around.

That was, until one case that had their paths cross again. Drug trafficking ended up with a murder. It had gone fine for a while- until a car came out of nowhere. Roy and Stefan were the first two to notice the barrel of a couple of guns sticking out of both windows. Despite Stefan's yell of warning and a few people ducking and shouting themselves, Richard seemed oblivious, too busy examining a piece of evidence.

"Damn it, Phelps!" Roy called before he even realized what he had said over the gunfire that had already started a few feet down the street. He tackled Richard to the ground, having flashbacks almost immediately- the roles were just reversed- and it wasn't actually Phelps there with him. They lay still for a while, until there was the sound of screeching tires, a crash, and then a few of the gathered patrol officers started yelling and running in the direction that the crash had come from. Roy let out a breath he didn't realize he was holding, and looked over at Richard. The younger man was looking at him, eyes blown wide, mouth agape. Roy wasn't sure if it was just reaction to the situation or the fact he had just called him Phelps. He pushed that aside. "Bekowsky? Stefan!" He called, rolling onto his knees and pushing himself upright.

Stefan stood up from his spot behind a mailbox and waved. "I'm good! You good?" He started walking over, making sure that the patrol officers were dragging the shooters and driver from the car a few feet away.

Roy offered a thumbs up, then looked back at Richard. "Dick?"

"I'm- I'm fine." Richard replied, then paused. "Hold on a second. You called me _Phelps_."

"He what?" Stefan arched an eyebrow.

"He- Earle just called me Phelps. Is… you talked about Cole. Just Cole. And now… with what you said about Roy and Cole, and him… are Cole and Phelps the same person?"

Roy frowned. "I don't like where this is going…"

"I just- Cole Phelps- is- was my cousin." Richard added.

Roy stared at him, then, without so much as blinking, brought his fist back, then slammed it hard into Richard's jaw.

"NO! Roy, no!" Stefan called, running over before Roy could continue the assault. "Not worth it!" He blurted, hooking one arm under Roy's in order to put it across the other man's chest to pull it back.

"Come on, Bekow! Just one punch! Lemme at him! The kid comes to this division and he doesn't even do his damn research about who's… argh!" He tried to kick at Richard, who had stumbled back, but Stefan had a better grip. "He thinks he can come back and be Cole's damn twin and be Cole every chance and punch me in the gut with it and…. ah, ah, okay." Roy trailed off when he felt his airflow getting smaller and smaller from Stefan pressing too hard.

Stefan let his friend sag against him, then looked at Richard. "Believe me now?" He demanded.

"Yeah," Richard nodded, nursing his jaw. He got up, and limped his way over to one of the patrol officers who had made their way back to where they were.

Roy panted. "This is Cole's way of haunting me and making me regret everything, isn't it?"

Stefan smirked and patted his shoulder. "I'm starting to think so, Roy."

"Well fuck. And I hate that kid."

Stefan patted his shoulder. "Remember, second chance. If the last time was a right hook, this might have been a kick where the Sun don't shine." Stefan replied. "So be nice."

"I don't do nice, Bekowsky."

"Try," Stefan countered.

"Fine… but can I punch him again?"

"No,"

"Just once? Please? For putting the both of us through that?"

"… Fine. But just clip him next time… and wait 'til tomorrow."

"That's why I love you these days."

"Hey, keep that up and I'll change my mind."

"You got it."

"Wow. Now seriously, stop. This is weird. You must've hit your head when you fell…"


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Alright, I essentially shot myself in the foot and went with a cliché that kinda renders the last chapter useless, but it keeps this fic alive for x amount of more chapters. Which of course, means more Roy mental torture, which I love. Don't run away just get, there's a semi-logical explanation for what happens. Read on, and stick with me. It'll make me love y'all more.**

* * *

Roy groaned when high pitched screeches woke him up from what was one of the very few decent night sleeps he'd had in the last few days. The little gremlin was just over three months old and he was already a royal pain. He had been living with Stefan and Viv for six months of the last year after sassing his landlord one too many times. At first he had hated Stefan and Viv, since they were in the newlywed stage after getting hitched because the little brat decided it was time to exist, but now- the kid being alive and well was worse. "Someone shut that thing up!"

"How about _you_ shut up, Roy. We're getting _him_!" Stefan called. "Him, Roy. Finn's a person."

"A very small person who shouldn't count as a person yet," Roy replied.

Stefan groaned, then there was silence for a while.

Roy got up and stood in the doorway, waiting for Stefan again. It was three hours before they would usually get up for work, so now there was no point in going back to sleep.

"I still had Lewis, you ass. If you hadn't been all 'I will shoot', I would've been able to tackle him."

"He had twenty feet on you, Roy. You might be good with tackling people, but a, you can't jump that far, b, you wouldn't risk your suit for it, either," Stefan replied, then glanced into the living room as they made it into the house. "Hey, Viv? Gordon? Ya there?" he called, tossing his jacket to the side.

Usually on Tuesdays, the pair would come home to a newly-arrived Gordon Leary helping Viv take care of Finn. The year prior, after Viv dragged him to a family reunion of her mother's, he found out that she and Gordon were cousins. He was absolutely mortified, but Gordon had only laughed it off, clapped him on the back and said it was fitting they ended up more or less family, which, of course prompted the "break her heart and I'll break your legs" threat that made Stefan happy that Gordon was no longer his boss. But now he came in and saw Viv and Gordon had their eyes glued to the television, and Finn was sitting on the floor against Gordon's shins, holding onto Gordon's hand that was all but limp. "Guys…?"

Gordon finally snapped out of it in order to look at them. "Uh, you guys uh… you may wanna… take a look at this."

The pair turned to see what the commotion was about, and both of their hearts practically stopped. It was some commercial for some grocer that looked a little too happy to be a farmer, but it was what was behind him that got them. It was Cole, but at the same time, it didn't seem like him, with a bright smile as he spoke to some customer. The man looked odd out of his usual suit and in a polo, jeans and an apron for the place.

The pair stared at the screen for a while before Roy turned sharply and headed for the phone in the corner.

Stefan stopped gawking at the television when he heard Roy all but slamming his fist into the phone do dial a number.

Seconds later, someone picked up, and Roy went off on him. "I swear to God, Dick, if this is some-"

"Roy!" Stefan warned.

"No, Stef! I'm shooting him this time!" Roy replied. "News- five. Now. If this is some joke and that idiot wife of yours made you look-"

Richard finally spoke after a few seconds. "It's not a joke, Earle! I'm as confused as you are! What, you think I wouldn't tell you that I saw my dead cousin on the news? I'd rather not have you murder me, thanks."

"Well it wouldn't be surprising if you were toying with me,"

"Would you shut up? Can we please focus on the fact Cole's just magically alive?"

Roy cursed again then slammed down the receiver and glanced back at the television to see if the ad was still on. No such luck- or lack of luck, anyway.

"You boys wanna get down there?" Gordon asked after a while of silence.

Roy glanced at him. "Wha…?"

Gordon got up, picking up Finn in the process. "There are gonna be some very angry people that homicide had to let go of and then some from back in the day and then some, remember?"

Stefan frowned. "Cap…?"

"Viv and I can take care of the kid. Go sort this out," Gordon replied.

Stefan opened his mouth.

Gordon arched an eyebrow. "Do you really doubt that your son's mother and second cousin can take care of the kid for an hour or longer? Go find Phelps and figure out whatever the Hell is going on before the people who got out because of that crap go to find him first," Gordon continued. He frowned when Stefan opened his mouth. "Hey, Stef. I may not be your boss anymore but that doesn't mean I can't pull strings –"

Stefan shot up and he and Roy scrambled for the door, getting out and hurrying into Stefan's car. all but It wasn't until they were halfway down the driveway that they realized they had no clue where they were headed.

As if on cue, Gordon poked his head out of the door. "Green's Market on Fifth!" he called.

And so, they were off.

LA LA LA LA LA LA

When they reached Green's Market, the pair refused to take any chances. Roy all but shoved his gun in his holster, and Roy made sure to park close to the place and mapped out five different exits. They walked in, and when they saw Cole, or another one of his mysterious twins, Roy almost tripped over his feet and Stefan just stared. When Roy went to turn around and walk right back out,Stefan grabbed him.

"No! No! You are not growing a conscience now! You're not gonna leave me to this, either!" he hissed, then all but shoved Roy forward, only to be shoved forward right after when Roy turned back around. Stefan approached Cole carefully, relieved that the man's back was turned. "Uh… Phelps?"

Cole turned and smiled at them. "Hi, fellas. Can I help you?"

Stefan let out a syllable's worth of a laugh. "Cole, what… it's us! How did you…?"

Cole raised his eyebrows. "Did what? Do you gentleman need help with something?" the smile came back.

Roy continued to stare and tried to ignore his stomach going in knots. Cole was smiling, and it looked genuinely carefree- gone was the uncertainty he had seen in Cole's smiles all those years before. The smiles that barely existed. Cole looked away for a moment at another customer who dropped something, and the smile dropped briefly into a frown, and Roy's heart dropped to his stomach. Now that look he knew. Great. Now his nightmares were coming true. They were literally coming through? But how? No man could survive getting tossed around in an overflowing sewer like a ragdoll. What the Hell had he done to deserve this? It wasn't like he had done some horrible things that he deserved a lot of bad things to happen to him. He knew that. He had just expected to get shot and killed, one of Mickey's goons getting the jump on him and stabbing or shooting him to death. Imprisonment with an eager cellmate for at least one of the crimes he pulled. But no, this was… … this was an entirely different situation. This was Hell and then some. And he hated it. He didn't even know what 'it' was.

Cole turned back to them. "Well, how can I help you?"

"This isn't fucking funny, Phelps. The Hell are you playing at? You know us!" Roy blurted.

Cole's eyebrows shot up again and he gawked at Roy. "I don't think there's need for an attitude, and sorry fellas, but I don't know you. I've never seen you in my life."

Stefan glanced at Roy and saw the vein start to pop up on his forehead. Now it was a countdown til he blew. "I… sir… um, well, you do, but… this is…" How could he explain to a guy who, for all they knew was playing them- or if he wasn't- how a man had survived that and then gotten out with just one Hell of a case of amnesia. He gathered his thoughts, then worked out an idea. He took his badge out. "Stefan Bekowsky, LAPD. The loudmouth's Roy Earle. What… how did you come across this job?"

Cole frowned, then looked at a man in a suit in the opposite corner. "Is Ron in trouble, officers?"

"No, but you're gonna be if you don't answer the damn questions," Roy snapped.

"Roy!" Stefan warned. He turned to Cole. "Phelps, if this is a joke-"

"It's not fucking funny," Roy cut in.

Stefan pushed Roy back. "Ignore him. Look, I get you'd play dumb since Roy's here, but-"

Cole shook his head. "I just told you two I've never seen you in my life. You have my name, but that's all at the moment. And you, sir: You know, there are ladies present. You shouldn't be-"

"Oh, now he sounds like himself. Being all proper and telling me how wrong I am. Believe that, Bekow?" Roy cut him off.

"Roy, shut up," Stefan countered. He looked at Cole. "Phelps… you do know us, but you clearly…" He stopped again. He still didn't know how to go about this.

But, Fate prevented him from doing so. After a few seconds of silence, there came shouting and cursing from outside.

The trio turned sharply to see what was going on, taking in two cars with people piling out of them with another coming.

Roy took a chance to sigh and grabbed Cole's sleeve despite the man trying to shake him off and see the commotion again. "Ya know, someday Leary's gonna be wrong and I will be so damn happy.."

"What…?" Stefan began, finally catching sight of a couple of the men outside pulling guns from their belts. "Shit! Who?!"

"Cohen. Phelps, you're gonna have to go with our word on this one," Roy explained before shoving him towards the back, just as the others outside started opening fire on the shop, shattering the windows and sending customers and workers alike scattering.

"Bekow, cover!" Roy replied, giving Cole a good shove towards the back of the store and what he hoped was an exit. When he felt Cole under his hands, his stomach turned again because the contact made it all the more real- Phelps was here, alive, it wasn't Dick, and he didn't have a clue about them, and now people were after him. He had a feeling this was God's twisted way of sending him a tiny blessing wrapped up in an infinite amount of disaster and more nightmares, but he figured now wasn't the time to revisit his faith or luck or whatever. He kicked down the closest door once they reached the back and was relieved to see the parking lot- and Stefan's car.

"What is happening?! Who are you people?!" Cole called, ducking when another round of fire came their way. "Are they… They're shooting at us?! Who are they and why are they shooting at us?!"

Roy shoved Cole's head down to return a couple of the shooter's fire, grinning momentarily when he shot one in the chest. "Actually, Phelps, they're shooting at you."

"Why?! And how do you know me?!"

"Oh, now you believe us!" Roy replied.

Cole glared at him, and Roy had to remind himself now wasn't the time to let adrenaline take over and make the mistake of hugging him, because now- that was Cole- that glare directed at him, more than the frown, more than the interrogation- Cole was alive and angry at him and it suddenly felt like home, five years ago when his life was just a little less miserable. "Get the fuck out of here now, talk later!" He barked after a moment. They got to the car and he risked firing off a couple of rounds before unlocking both doors, swinging the passenger door open and all but throwing Cole inside. "Stay down!" He barked, He slammed the door shut and fired off, killing another goon. It took him a moment to realize he hadn't heard Stefan's gun. "Bekowsky!" he barked. He would forever deny the relieved sigh that followed when he saw Stefan turn the corner from the front of the store and barrel towards the car. "Come on, come on, come on!"

He got in, shoved the co-passenger door open and started the car, not waiting for Stefan to get completely settled when he finally made it into the car before zooming away.

"How many cars we got?!" Roy called.

"Two. I took out one's tires," Stefan replied. "Where the Hell is Phelps?"

Roy jabbed his finger towards the backseat before taking a sharp turn that tossed all three of them to the right.

Stefan turned. "We hijacked Phelps?!"

"I think the proper phrase is 'saved his life.' Scratch that, we're still in the process, so 'saving'. We got one coming on your right."

Stefan leaned out the window and fired at the goon's car.

Cole finally leaned forward. "Can one of you tell me-"

"SHUT UP AND STAY DOWN, PHELPS!" the pair shouted in unison.

Cole drew back and ducked again, then scrambled lower when a bullet shattered the back windshield.

The chase continued for a good few minutes, and Roy finally pulled over when he was certain there was only one car with two people left, and they had lost in somewhere on Broadway. He pulled into a parking spot in a lot that was flanked by two giant trees and finally relaxed, trying to loosen the vice grip he had on the wheel.

After another few minutes of dead silence, Cole finally spoke up. "You boys want to explain what all that was now?" he demanded. "Who are you people and why were those people shooting at me? How do you know me? If you know me why didn't you show any time sooner?"

Stefan noticed Roy went rigid and his vicegrip on the wheel was back at the question, and he sighed. He turned slowly. "You sure you're okay after all this, Phelps? Because if you're not, you're just lucky you're sitting, because you're in for one Hell of a ride."


End file.
